cleaning. grandma.

I WANT TO BE A SLUT

My house is never clean enough!

Grandma.

My grandmother always said there were three kind of women,  those who paid people like her to clean their houses, those who kept their houses clean……and sluts!
My grandmother has a lot to answer for.  She gave my mother, so consequently me, some introjected value that  a clean house was somehow the measure of a respectable women and I can’t seem to get rid of it.

My grandmother would have a routine, where she did the washing on Monday, ironing on Tuesday. “bottom” the living room on Wednesday, “bottom “the bedrooms on Thursday, and of course the kitchen and bathroom got done every day. This was on top of doing a job.

She would do her tasks before going out, and could not have any fun or pleasure before she had done her tasks. Sort of like a reward.

Try as I may I cannot get rid of the guilt, of going out and leaving the pots unwashed or the house un vacuumed , even though I know in my head that life really is too short to do housework and on my tombstone, I do not really want it engraved

SHE ALWAYS KEPT AN IMMACULATE HOSE”!
I would rather have something like

SHE WAS A WARM AND LOVING  WIFE, MOTHER  AND GRANDMOTHER.
and got her prorities right

There are some women, I observe,  and most men, who never talk about cleaning. Cleaning does not seem to be an issue in their life. Yet when you go to their houses they are always clean and tidy. How do they do this?  Why do they not angst about their messy cupboards ( because I am sure if you opened their cupboards, all the rubbish they hide there, would fall out!)

My husband happily goes out and leaves the bed unmade and the dishwasher unemptied, if the bus is due  and never gives it a second thought till he returns.   I would be concious that I would have to make the bed and empty the dishwasher when I got home.

Some time last year I employed a cleaning firm to do a ” deep clean” of my house.    When I rang to arrange a date the lady said. “all we ask is that you remove the clutter, ornaments and such,  We can deep clean easier if we don’t have to move clutter”

…..by the time they came I had cleared every cupboard and surface in the place! LOL!

Still, for a while , I felt good.  Just knowing that my house was clean somehow made me feel secure, all was well with the world,  my house was clean.

  Chaos can be going on around me, but if the house is clean there is order in my life!

For a while I kept on top of the cleaning,  I made rotas and planned routines, timing each task so I knew exactly how long each job takes.  Oh but I soon got tired and bored with that and preferred to go out with a friend, biking, or blogging  leaving the housework, but the down side is the guilt and the nagging thought that it is waiting for me.

Two weeks ago, after coming back from Paris to a nice clean house,  I resolved to have a “cleaning day” each week.  Last week it was been half a day!.  This week I cleaned a patio window and cleaned under the sink……….   well the rain stopped, the sun shone so I went out on my bike,…. then on Monday I am caught up with Lizzie because I have not seen her for ages,  Then it is school holidays and I will have my grandson for a day.  Next week, who knows! LOL!

So I guess I will just have to live with the guilt and accept I AM a slut!

Denise
Love from Bolton

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10 thoughts on “I WANT TO BE A SLUT

  1. My oh my – I must admit you had me going with that headline too!!! I couldn't imagine what the content of your post could be with a headline like that!!! LOL! Your feelings about cleaning are a lot the same as mine- I know I should be cleaning on a regular basis but if I get a call to go to lunch with a friend then I think the cleaning can wait – it will still be there when I get back!! It is also difficult for me to go away and not have a clean house – lately, I have been hiring a service instead of doing it myself and that makes it so much easier!

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  2. Talk about an attention grabbing title! I'm with Gwan, you certainly are a tease! ;)Isn't it interesting the seeds that our ancestors plant in our heads. I'm happy that you decided to plant a few of your own and allow yourself to enjoy a sunny afternoon and time with Lizzie. Those are the things that you'll remember…not a clean kitchen sink! (And, yes, I could feel my mother's German ancestors turning in their graves as I wrote those last words!).

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  3. Now I see what all the talk is about. It's surprising (maybe) how much can be done in a short amount of time, if that amount of time is used each day. Making the bed, washing the dishes, sweeping the floors, tidying the bath, and one or two more each day–everything else seems to fall in line. And honestly, a rich life means you never have to explain the condition of your home.

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  4. I realise with the reaction to the headline there are different cultural meanings for the word "slut". My Grandmas generation in the North of England would use the term to describe a lazy slovenly woman, not necessarily mean sexually promiscuous as is the modern meaning. However, it grabbed you attention didn't it!!! LOL!Joseph , I love your tips on your blog. I now know the RIGHT way to do things….I am just too busy doing others! LOL!Love Denise

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  6. Don’t you mean “slob” ? Certainly not “slut” I am sure ?!! Isn’t that something completely different from just not caring about housecleaning ?

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