“MyLife Plan B”    was the title of a blog post on freshly pressed a couple of  weeks ago from Mama Bear,  the blogger behind Call Me She Bear, who is almost 40 years old, and coming to terms with the fact that her life hasn’t turned out quite the way she’d been planning.

Hmm!  Know the feeling.  But I never really had a plan A.  My life just kind of evolved and suddenly I am nearly 63, probably the most content I have ever been and thinking the time for dreaming is gone.

But with the New Year I keep reading other bloggers plans for 2013 ( are all bloggers deamers?)  and their achievements in 2012….and think,  maybe I should not just amble along  without any vision,  maybe I had better  try to get some structure to my life and make some plans.

In AA we have a prayer that ends every meeting,

 God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change

Courage to change the things I can’t

and the wisdom to know the difference.

So maybe I have been accepting too much instead of changing, but the trick is the wisdom to know the difference.

All my life I have resolved to be more organised, started new routines, diets, exercise etc. … Never really happened.   I am still the inconsistent  disorganised slob person I always was.

The only things I have ever been consistent in is sobriety,  cycling and Paris…. and maybe this blog,  as it has been going on a couple of years now, although the anniversary of “going public” is coming up.

  Just yesterday, day one of   ” I will give myself more maintenance”   it was 2.30pm before I got in the shower.  I did manage to put on a face pack and exfoliate myself.  I  manicured my nails , but by then I got fed up and the feet were neglected and the hair was left to dry! I put on clean pyjamas and made some sandwiches. for tea!

( Micheal  still cannot eat as his mouth is still very infected with thrush and ulcers so I can’t be bothered cooking for one)

 I have still not made a list of balanced meals we can have  for the next week, so Michael can do the shopping and the wash basket is overflowing as I have been away for most of the past ten days.

So, I have decided to make a list (again!) for 2013.  Things I would like to achieve or work toward.

So apart from trying not to be so grumpy.. ( I don’t really think I am grumpy, but my daughter Sunshine tells me I am, so I have made a promise to her)  This is the list……

1. Have a shower and get dressed BEFORE breakfast, as I get sat in front of the computer, then “just fill the dishwasher” or “just put this thing away”  or”just clean the kitchen” ….and then suddenly it is mid afternoon and I am still in my pyjamas.
2. On Thursday nights, plan the meals for the next week, so Michael can shop and I have what I need to cook for the freezer on Saturdays. So that I don’t come home late, as I have done tonight and said “Oh lets just go to the chippie!”
3. On Sunday nights.  Do nails and feet. Face pack etc.
4. For two weeks at least, use skin care religiously to see if it makes any difference.
5. Do one kind thing a day.  But it doesn’t count if you tell anybody.
6. On Monday nights.  Look at my bank account! LOL!  ….. (I am not saying this will keep my finances in order, but at least I cannot say I don’t know any more)

Enough of self self-improvement these are things I want to DO.

1. Enrol on a creative writing course.
2. Visit brother and family in California in April
3. Visit at least one other city than Paris.
4. For at least a weekend, pack my cycle bags and stay away overnight.
5. Clear the vegetable patch.  ( it’s unlikely I will plant anything as I will be away during planting season visiting my brother)
6. Decorate the bedroom. If I don’t sell the house by March.

So now I have written that down,  all that looks a bit overwhelming, so maybe I should break it down into achievable goals.

Maybe I will just concentrate on number  one.

Go and have a shower NOW.

 Maybe the rest will follow.

Love  Denise