One of my favourite reads is the blog ” tales from the chambre de bonne” and recently the author, Ella, published this reflection on , giving it all up and making your dream come true, as she did by moving to Paris.
When I was young, a nice house, a satisfying career faithful husband, two children and enough money to be comfortable, were my aspirations and I achieved these by the time I was 30. I did not think of these as “dreams” just a direction in which I steered my life, because my value system told me these were the things I should aim for.
OK we all know we could get knocked down by a bus tomorrow, but realistically at thirty, forty and even fifty, all things being equal, we have time to plan.
But Ella’s post has made me think. Maybe I can indulge in a dream and work toward it? because maybe people need to dream.
What would that dream be? Do I really want to move to Paris…. when I think about it, no. I spent 5 weeks there a couple of years ago and that taught me that, although I love cities and especially Paris, I don’t want to live in one. ( unless I was a millionaire and could buy a mansion!) Too confined. I like the space of my home, the view and proximity of the green hills and being able to walk out into my garden. I like being English,. I like being a visitor, I would not want visiting to be taken over by the routine of life.
I have also learned that the people I love and who love me, are the most important and precious thing in life and when my last day comes it will be the people around me that will matter, not where I am or what I have acquired.
So one of my aims will be to savour and improve those relationships. In her post Ella said a very powerful thing
“never underestimate the power of being a good person, it really does go a long way”
So maybe one of my dreams is to try to be a good person, try not to be grumpy, impatient and bad tempered, but most of all try to be kind.
My other dream is to travel. Having got over my chronic homesickness that prevented me from travelling all my life, I now want to make up for lost time and explore the world. Other cultures, other countries. even this country, for I have by no means seen it all.. My dream would be to take my wheeled carryon, and travel as far as I can..
Of course I don’t want to leave Michael for too long and he does not want to come with me. Plus, who knows how long we have left together?. This unlikely man, who did not fit the picture of my ideal mate, Who cuts my hair and polishes my shoes, does the shopping and generally makes me laugh. Who for the past twenty odd years has walked beside me in life. Patiently seeing me through every phase, whim and obsession, up and down, for better for worse, in sickness and in health.
To my chagrin, I missed him a lot when I was a week in Boston and I know will miss him and the children a lot, when I visit California, for nearly four weeks, next spring. .So for the moment I have to be content with shorter trips. Some times life is also about compromises to fulfil all your dreams. Sometimes you can’t have your cake and eat it too!
Last week I got so fed up with the office politics at work that I nearly handed in my notice, but of course, my part time job, supplements my pensions and enables me to travel so maybe this is a compromise I have to live with for my dream.
So maybe for now I will just book a weekend trip to Glasgow, it is somewhere I have never been and enrol in an art class to improve my painting skills!…and really learn French, just in case!
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